5 Sneaky Reasons You Sabotage Your Self-Care

4 min readMar 29, 2021


Has it ever crossed your mind that you secretly want to sabotage your self-care? How are you feeling right now? Are you happy with where you are physically and emotionally? Would you be considered healthy by your doctor?

These are essential questions. As much as you have good intentions regarding your health, it’s not as though you want to be unhealthy, but subconsciously there might be something holding you back from becoming the healthiest and happiest versions of yourself.

Here are some of the top tactics you use to sabotage your self-care:

You Make Excuses

There’s always a reason for not getting something done. Especially true when you sabotage your self-care. You say you don’t have time to exercise or don’t have the money to eat right. You become so good at making excuses that you don’t need to try at all. So, how do you stop it?

Here’s how Dr. Jennifer Ashton, The Self-Care Solution: A Year of Becoming Happier, Healthier and Fitter, addresses this, “Like many people, making resolutions stick permanently, knowing what’s really beneficial to you, is easier said than done — but doing something for one month? That feels achievable. That feels like a great opportunity to understand how different kinds of self-care can have positive impacts on your life.”

“Looking back now, I never could have guessed the profound effect that this personal experiment would have on me. From my emotional state to my diet to my sleep, I ended the year stronger than I have been in a long time. And, what I learned about myself along the way was truly surprising,” admitted Jennifer.

So, Like the shoe company says, just do it!

You Sabotage Your Self-Care When You Choose the Wrong Companions

Not everyone is on a journey to better health. Hanging around with people who are opposed to your goals is a sure way you sabotage your self-care. What’s worse is when your friends say things about your efforts. At the worst levels, the people around us become abusive; they hurt your health mentally and physically. People like these need to be avoided at all costs.

You Sabotage Your Self-Care When You Worry What Other People Will Think

Are you afraid of looking foolish? One of the most common reasons people avoid going to the gym is that they worry others will make fun of them. You are looking outside of yourself to fill something only you can fill. No amount of approval from an outside source will ever make you feel whole. You’re filled once, but you will need it again and again. It is an addictive cycle that turns you away from yourself. The only way past this? Focus on you and not on what others think. Don’t wait for someone else’s permission to be amazing. Stand in your own power.

“Self-care is never a selfish act — it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others.” — Parker Palmer

You Feel Like You Won’t Be Good Enough

Sometimes it’s hard to get started because you feel like you’re going to fail right away. You know you’re going to go off the diet. You want to begin an exercise plan, but you think you will be clumsy. When your expectations are too high for yourself, it’s very easy to defeat positive self-care efforts before you even begin. The cure is setting better, more realistic goals.

You Don’t Think You Deserve It

Why should you get to spend time on yourself? Too often, you start thinking you are selfish if you spend time or money on yourself. You believe pushing yourself to the point of exhaustion will lead to a bigger reward. But is this realistic? To prevent burnout and keep stress from taking over, you need to take time for yourself. Besides, taking breaks will help you refocus, especially when solving complicated problems. But since when is taking care of you a bad thing?

In every one of these methods, the cure is relatively simple. You need to realize just how wonderful you are. You do not need to sabotage your self-care. You are worth the effort! End of story.

I am Shirley Noah, author and an internationally known stress expert and entrepreneur. I would love to connect further with you to help you improve your health and wellbeing. If you are interested in learning more about your self-care, please take a look at “Self-Care: The Art of a Happier More Peaceful Self.




Founder of In Good Health Coach: simple methods for healthy living and overcoming stress once and for all. https://ingoodhealthcoach.com/